Dear Future Self,
I'm currently on a remarkable journey, overcoming challenges with unwavering determination. Life has thrown various obstacles my way, but I firmly believe that each difficulty offers a chance to learn and grow. Failures and disappointments have become stepping stones in my path toward becoming a stronger, wiser individual.
Right now, I'm focused on redesigning my life, setting clear goals, and working relentlessly toward them. I know this journey won't be without its challenges, but I've discovered an inner strength that drives me forward.
My goal is to share my story of struggle to inspire others. We all have the potential to rise above adversity and chase our dreams. I'm open to learning from others' experiences, and together, we can become the best versions of ourselves.
Let's take on this journey together, facing each challenge with determination and hope, because I believe the future is full of possibilities. I stand as proof that we can overcome adversity, and together, we will achieve success.
With hope and strength,
Aris Arisandi
Echoes of Longing - A poems from "Can I call you sometime?"
By Idnasirasira - August 24, 2023
In the realm of missing hearts, I stand,
Have you ever missed someone, my friend?
A void within, an ache that's real,
Thoughts of her, an emotion I feel.
Have you ever missed someone, my friend?
A void within, an ache that's real,
Thoughts of her, an emotion I feel.
A solitary path, I often tread,
To anyone else, I can't be led.
In memories, I dwell so deep,
Doing everything for her, I keep.
Regrets sometimes cloud my view,
Our past, a tapestry of shades and hue.
She, not a listener, yet I yearn to share,
Talk of everything, lay my soul bare.
Love lingers still, a flame aglow,
Impossible to let go, this I know.
Without her, life's an intricate chore,
Yearning for her, I can't ignore.
I miss her quirks, her childish glee,
Her imperfections, a symphony.
A confidante I need, a soul to see,
In her presence, I wish to be free.
"Can I call you sometime?" I dared to say,
"Anytime," her words did sway.
But now the line remains untouched,
To respond seems to hurt too much.
I delay, I avoid, messages go unread,
A way to ensure our ties have shred.
For her, perhaps it's best to let go,
Find a brighter path, let her heart grow.
Is this my course, the right decree?
In the night's embrace, I still plea.
Uncertainty lingers, like shadows in night,
Love's complex dance, a continuous fight.
Read the writing here -> Can I call you sometime?
As I feel the weight of exhaustion settle in, a sad question fills my thoughts: "If everyone is tired of me, who will stay with me?" Memories of laughter and closeness now feel distant. Faces that used to smile seem distant now, leaving me feeling alone. This thought hurts, and I wish for someone who won't be tired of me, someone who will stand by my side. The road ahead seems unsure, wrapped in sadness, as I look for that one person who will see past the tiredness and be a true friend.
In a bustling city that thrived on noise and activity, I often found myself lost in the midst of it all, surrounded by the ebb and flow of life. Maybe I'm not a good person, I'd often think to myself, my actions sometimes clashing with the empathy that simmered within me. It was as if there were two sides of me - the exterior that others saw, and the intricate tangle of emotions that remained hidden beneath.
One day, in search of solace, I boarded a train, seeking refuge from the cacophony of the city streets. As the train's rhythmic motion carried me away, I found myself immersed in the sea of faces around me. Each person seemed to carry a world of thoughts, hopes, and worries, and I couldn't help but wonder about the stories etched into their expressions.
I gazed out of the window, the passing landscape a blur as my mind wandered. In this moment, I felt a connection to the strangers around me, united by our shared humanity and the weight we all carried. The chaos of life seemed to fade away, replaced by a quiet camaraderie, an unspoken understanding that life wasn't always as it appeared.
As the journey continued, I realized how similar our struggles were, even though they remained unspoken. The masks we wore hid the battles we fought within, the fears we grappled with, and the hopes we dared to dream. The world was a tapestry of people, each thread representing a different story, a unique journey through life's challenges.
I listened to the silence of the train, the absence of words somehow conveying more than any conversation could. It was a reminder that sometimes, when words fell short, silence could offer solace. And in that silence, a bond formed, connecting us through our shared reticence.
The train took me to distant places, physically distancing me from the noise of my daily life. In that space, I found clarity and perspective. The isolation brought a sense of calm, allowing me to confront the turmoil that had been buried deep within.
I carried a message with me, a reminder to venture far and wide, to explore the corners of my own mind. Loneliness could be a guide, leading me to discover the strength that resided within me. I held onto hope, believing that after every storm, a period of tranquility would follow. Solutions waited patiently to be uncovered, like treasures hidden beneath the surface of my struggles.
The journey taught me to stand firm in the face of life's challenges, to weather the storms that would inevitably arise. It was a process of growth, a transformation into a stronger version of myself. And as the train carried me back to the city, I felt a newfound sense of purpose – to carry my burdens in silence when necessary, to acknowledge the struggles of others, and to find the beauty in our shared humanity.
"This writing is based on what I felt at that moment when I was inside the train."
Jakarta, 19 August 2023
Aris Arisandi
In your presence, I find delight untold,
Even if fleeting, it's a moment of gold.
Your essence brings comfort, warm and true,
In your company, I feel brand new.
The way you speak, your laughter's sweet sound,
Revealing love's magic, profound and profound.
And your smile, a portal to another sphere,
Where joy and serenity always appear.
But alas, I fear this is our goodbye,
Destined paths may lead us to say "Nigh."
Yet, if love's fate binds our souls together,
I'll embrace it wholly, now and forever.
With every beat of my heart, I declare,
The love I hold for you, it's rare and fair.
"When I saw you, you smiled and I loved you.
But when he came to you. My heart is broke."
When I first laid eyes on you, a warm sensation filled my heart as your smile radiated a captivating charm. In that moment, I couldn't help but feel an instant connection, and my affection for you blossomed effortlessly. Your smile, like a gentle ray of sunshine, brightened my day and ignited a spark within me.
However, as time passed, my heart sank when I noticed another person approaching you. It was as if my world turned upside down, and I felt a pang of sadness and disappointment deep within me. I watched from afar as he came into your life, and it seemed like my dreams of being with you shattered before my eyes.
It was a challenging moment for me to witness someone else capturing your attention, but I knew that I had to accept the reality of the situation. Love doesn't always work in our favor, and sometimes we have to come to terms with the fact that the person we adore may find happiness with someone else.
I took a step back and reminded myself that love is not about possessing someone or expecting them to reciprocate our feelings. It is about cherishing the moments we have, regardless of the outcome. While it's natural to feel heartbroken and vulnerable, I understood that I should appreciate the friendship we shared and the memories we created.
Life is filled with unexpected twists and turns, and love is a complex emotion that can both lift us to great heights and challenge us in profound ways. Despite the heartache, I am grateful for the opportunity to have known you and experienced the joy of your presence, even if it was fleeting.
As I reflect on our time together, I choose to embrace the beautiful memories we crafted and learn from this experience. Sometimes, unrequited love teaches us valuable lessons about ourselves and what we truly seek in a partner. It urges us to grow and explore the depths of our emotions.
I believe that everyone we encounter has a purpose in our journey, and though it might not always be apparent at first, every connection leaves an imprint on our souls. It is okay to feel vulnerable and broken-hearted, for these emotions are a testament to the depth of our capacity to love.
Life moves forward, and I know that someday, my heart will heal, and new opportunities will present themselves. Until then, I will carry the fond memories of you and the feelings you inspired, cherishing them as a reminder of the beauty and complexity of love. My heart may be bruised, but it is not defeated.
In the end, I wish you nothing but happiness and fulfillment in your life. Though we may walk separate paths, I'll forever treasure the moments we shared and the way your smile touched my soul. Love is a journey, and I will embrace its uncertainties with an open heart, ready to explore what the future holds.
